Kodomo No Nomimono Sangaria Soft Drink

Origin - Japan
Rating - Good
Step aside for wackiness, we present to you:  Kodomo No Nomimono Sangaria Soft Drink. It looks like beer and gets a head like beer but this is a drink from it's own magical kingdom. I originally thought this was some kind of "sangria", just spelled wrong (engrish, what you gone do?). It smells like rubber, a turn off but I've smelled much worse. It has the most bizarre taste, kinda like an artificial beer flavor mixed with apple cider and cream soda. Also, as Ms. K pointed out, it contains TUNA OIL!! Surprises! I have to admit I like it but it confuses me greatly (much like Japan).
~Reviewed by Andy X 

Kodomo near beer
Rating: Good
Mmmm sparkly appleish Japanese near beer. This is a pretty tasty soda. I wonder what's in this.... ummm tuna oil. Let's just try to forget that. But there's also beer flavouring. Is that a powder? Can you get it in a spray? Where can I get some of that!?!
~Reviewed by Ms. K

Okazaki Coffee Jelly

Origin - Japan
Rating - Awesome
We picked this up because, wtf?! It's coffee in jelly form! It comes in a 3 pack and includes a little creamer (which states coffee fresh, huh?)with each bowl. The first thing it did was spit coffee juices all over Ms. K's art desk when I opened it, but we'll forgive Okazaki because this may be the best product to ever be made....in history. It tastes like...well...coffee, but really good, slightly sweet coffee! I could eat this all day long. The creamer, however, has no taste and is the consistency of soap. To be fair I don't think it was meant to be refrigerated though, I left one on the counter to see if it thins up a bit.

Separate

Mixed (the creamer wouldn't dissolve into the jelly/jell-o)

 Here's the money maker: who the fuck has time to have a cup of coffee AND make some goddamn toast in the morning? Some rich, lazy son of bitch that's who! I present to you:

The Munchies de Sade Ultimate Breakfast (TM) for fuckers on the go:

No, really...this is bitchin!
~Reviewed by Andy X

Looking For: (help a fucker out!)

Occasionally, I come across an item too stupid for me not to have. However, I usually can't justify spending an arm and a leg just to disgust myself for your entertainment. There are a few items I would like to get my hands on that I would gladly pay for (if the price is right: don't be a fucker!) or even trade for (I've got every kind of international grocery store here in Winnipeg). You could also just send me something to up your "dude" creds. You can contact me at thrashdisaster(@)hotmail.com (only serious inquiries, I don't care about your grandpa's gout!)
Here's a couple I had in mind:

Larry the Cable Guy Cheeseburger Dinner Boxed Skillet Meal
(wow, yeah...really!)

Salty Watermelon Pepsi Cola
***ACQUIRED*** Review next month

Pepsi Ice Cucumber
(or ANY Japan/Other country exclusive Pepsi or soda product)

The illusive Trekking Mahlzeiten Cheeseburger in a Can
(hard to come by! don't know if they're making these anymore)

Grant's Haggis Curry
 (oh fuck no!)











 
Underwood Roast Beef Spread

 (I can almost think of nothing worse, well maybe Glutenous Tid-bits...)








Thanks, 
Andy X

Mystery Ramune, Condom Flavor?

 











Origin - Japan
Rating - Good
I wasn't sure what the flavor of this was when I bought it, what a risky experiment! It does have what appears to be a condom on the bottle so one can only assume it tastes like Alabama white fish.

After a sample, I'm pretty sure this is the popular "soda" flavor (it is blue for fuck's sake) that Japan likes to magically pump out. It's not bad and it's not too sweet like other "soda" (kinda like cream soda, cotton candy) products I've had. But you know what would make this even better? That's right,  
fuckin' booze!

Here's the recipe for a little cocktail I call:

The Innuendo:
1 OZ. Spice Box Spiced Whiskey
2 OZ. Condom Ramune
Ice

Good Choice Jeera Masala Soda

 










 
Origin - India
Rating - Donkey Shit
The Real Taste of India?
Rarely do I come across a product this bad. Memories of "Glutenous Tid-bits" came to mind as I spit my first taste back into my glass. It's so bad that I felt we needed a poem to heal the pain "Jeera" has caused. Please read on:

Twas thick like liquified Yoda,
The drink they called Marsala Soda.
The name implied Good Choice,
but it made Satan rejoice,
for it tasted of pee stained Pagoda.

Upon first opening of the Masala Soda, you'll quickly catch the scent of curry, like sticking your nose head on into a big can of cheap, no-name curry. It's unnaturally thick, like watered down corn syrup and the taste is something of legend. It's a toss up between recycled plastic, year old concentrated home brew and what you would imagine the air inside Joey Ramone's coffin to taste like. This is so bad. I might write a letter to Good Choice and post the response here. Don't you think we deserve an explanation for soda this bad?? I'm sure they'll at least like my poem...
~Reviewed by Andy X


Masala Soda
Rating: Donkey Shit
Rarely do one of this products surprise me with their level of badness but this soda really caught me off guard. The second it hit my lips/the tip of my tongue, I knew I had a met my match. My body spit it out into the sink in self defense. It's soo thick and oily! BLARG!!! And there's a weird burn-y sensation. Oh maybe it's the four types of acids listed in the ingredients. I'm shocked it didn't eat right through bottle. I really wish it had.
~Reviewed by Ms. K

We're back in food hell.....

Welcome back! After a brief hiatus, we've decided this was fun and we 're picking up where we left off to bring you the world's nastiest, most unusual and most bizarre foods we can find. Truth be told, it can be a challenge some times but why the fuck not? Let's do this. Also, we're always looking for contributors to seek out the worst meal time has to offer, please get in touch so we can discuss. email me: thrashdisaster(@)hotmail.com

PS - If you've been brave enough to try some of the items reviewed on this blog, feel free to write your own review in the comments section. Or throw in your two cents, whatever honks your ding-dong.

Binggrae Power Cap Soda Flavored Ice Tube

Origin - Japan
Rating - Good
"Soda", I've come to learn, is a flavor of it's own in Japan. I've had a few "soda" flavored items in the past and they all taste the same. It's kinda like cotton candy, cream soda and bubble gum with a mysterious milky essence (keep your fucking jokes!) but slightly less sweet. The texture is odd, not like a popsicle but a little creamy and mushy. Why is it in a motor oil bottle? Hmmm. I like them regardless. Kind of expensive too, $7 for a bag of six. Did I mention I take donations? No pressure.

~Reviewed by Andy X