Glico Caplico Wafer Cookie

Origin - Japan
Rating - Good
Ms. K and I are familiar with the Glico name from their tasty Japanese curry that comes in bar form. So when we discovered this, we thought "what the fuck? try it!". I was hoping for something pretty weird but this is really just a big wafer cookie. What is weird though is the shape...just like how they form their curry, in "tablet bar form"! How uncreative! This has a layer of chocolate and vanilla stuff inside that's rock hard and doesn't really taste like much of anything. You can't really tell from the photo but I assure you, there is a layer. Not much else to tell, a small disappointment.
~Reviewed by Andy X

Morinaga Nama Ramune Gummies - Cola Flavor

Origin - Japan
Rating - Boston Baked Beans
I'd first like to state these are like a damn candy tattoo, as I'm sure I'll be tasting them forever. When purchasing them I thought "harmless gummies" but this is Munchies de Sade and we don't play that shit 'round here. These are thermo fucking nuclear when it come to taste. Hours after eating just one small cube I was still tasting the slightly sour cola flavor (not too far off from a 7/11 slushy that's been sitting out for a bit). They're not gummies either yet they live in the same neighborhood. They have sugary grit to them (which I'm sure is top secret proprietary fun time formula) but kind of squishy like a gummy. They're moist as well, probably chock full of cola good feelings or something. I was told they change texture depending on the temperature, so I put one in the fridge and one in the freezer. The fridge gummy almost resembled a softer candy corn while the freezer sample DID NOT FREEZE! Obviously some kind of alchemy is responsible. While I kind of enjoyed these, just keep in mind they are more weapon than treat, a true Boston Baked Bean.
~Reviewed by Andy X

Pocari Sweat

 














Origin - Japan
Rating - Boston Baked Beans
Here we have the legendary "Pocari Sweat", the drink with the unfortunate name. After finally trying it, I think the crazy fucks making this really want it to taste like simulated sweat. Why would you drink that? Because it has a nice citrus flavor! Although, it also has this very strong plastic taste or maybe some kind of aerosol deodorant. It's slightly thick and kind of salty (not too far off from Gatorade). But I keep drinking it! I can't decide if I like it or not, maybe if it was blue....
~Reviewed by Andy X

I couldn't think of a cocktail that would even work with Pocari Sweat so I thought of this instead:

Spicy Oyster Omelet Flavor Chips (Brand Unkown)

Origin - Taiwan
Rating - Not So Good
Ignore ol' Yankee Joe Potato, he's not your friend. Neither are these chips. They have a sour fishy taste but are a little zesty as well. I'm not a fan. The idea was good but the taste never comes together to produce anything worthwhile. Not disgusting but not good. They stink as well. Oh I didn't mention the smell? Think fish market on a hot day, that and the smell they stick into hot dogs. Even still, I have a strange desire to eat them with dill pickle dip...how awful! I'm a bad person.
~Reviewed by Andy X

 

What the hell is "vegan meat flavor"??

Bohol's Finest Peanut Fingers

Origin - Philippines
Rating - Not So Good
This is the best Filipino cookie I've ever had. That's not doing it any justice, any Filipino cookies I've had have been absolute turds. This, you can at least swallow. It's hard and crunchy and tastes like peanuts. That's about it. They're pretty bland and boring. They look like they've been squeezed through a playdough factory shape, so....not completely like a turd.
~Reviewed by Andy X

Big Katsu

Origin - Japan
Rating - Donkey Shit
I don't know if someone has played a cruel joke on me or not but I'm 60% sure this is a dog treat, just as sure that the Japanese characters above "UP!" stand for "THROW". What's the fucking deal here, really?? It stinks like a barn, it's kinda rubbery and has some nearly indescribable fish taste. I'm not sure if the brown lines printed on are suppose to be "grill marks" or extra "flavor" (a cringe worthy flavor that one can only imagine is the taste of that little girl's hair from "The Ring").

The biggest Katsu allowed by law

What I don't forgive myself for is looking what's actually inside. Is it egg? Is it pure fat? Is it a piece of Sloth's skin from Goonies? Big Katsu is a mystery even Scooby fucking Doo would run from, stay away!

~Reviewed by Andy X

Pepsi - Salty Watermelon Flavor

 













Origin - Japan
Rating - Good

Pepsi comes out with a couple weird new flavors every few months in Japan. You can only get them in Japan because Pepsi loves Japan and hates us, obviously. I managed to get one on eBay, they're expensive but sometimes someone sells them a little cheaper, you just have to watch. Anyways, despite it's weirdness, it's pretty good. The best way for me to describe it is "Faygo Red Pop" with a "Jolly Rancher" watermelon flavor but maybe a little less sweet. For those of you who've never had a Faygo Red Pop, just think strawberry pop that doesn't taste like strawberry.....just kinda red I guess. I couldn't detect any saltiness, that's probably a good thing. Salty watermelon just screams to be mixed with tequila (it just does!), so I whipped up a little cocktail that turned out a little weird (which is ok because I don't think anyone will ever get to try it).
~Reviewed by Andy X

The Tutti Fuckin' Frutti
1oz. Silver Tequila
1/2oz. Peach Schnapps
3oz. Pepsi Salty Watermelon
Splash of Vanilla Vodka
Ice